Panic #5

Credits:
Cover dated October/November 1954
Cover by Al Feldstein

"Tick Dracy" - Art by Bill Elder/Story by Nick Meglin & Al Feldstein
"Baseball Jargon"/"Golf Match!"/"Football Terms!"/"Basketball!" - Art by Jack Davis/Story by Al
Feldstein
"Spots Before Your Eyes!" - Art by Joe Orlando/Story by Al Feldstein
"You Too Can Hook a Zillionaire!" - Art by Wally Wood/Story by Al Feldstein

My first issue of Panic, which EC brought into play to act as a Mad-imitator, just as many other Mad imitators were coming into the market. Unlike Mad, which was edited by Harvey Kurtzman, Panic was edited by Al Feldstein, who edited most of EC's other comics. Overall I wasn't much of a fan of EC's humor comics and that applies here. This is a so-so issue at best and I don't have much thoughts on the individual stories.

"Tick Dracy" - This is a parody of the well known comic Dick Tracy. In this story Tick tries to
solve the mystery of why his wife Mess Falseheart keeps getting cuts on her face. Tick chases down
and murders various parodies of Dick Tracy villains, despite the fact that they've all gone clean
and are innocent. At the end of the story it is revealed that Dick Tracy's face (which is always
shown from the side) is razor thin and him kissing her every night is cutting up her face.

"Baseball Jargon"/"Golf Match!"/"Football Terms!"/"Basketball!" - This story shows literal
translations of various baseball terms that we're used to hearing, to comedic effect. The story also
covers golf, football and basketball in similar such fashions. The story is more of individual panel
gags than a traditional story.

"Spots Before Your Eyes" - This story features parodies of 3 newscasters. The first covers a sportscaster, who goes through a long spiel before revealing that there were no sports that day. The second covers a weather caster who spends much of the broadcast doing tic-tac-toe. The third covers a garden expert who shows how to have a fine garden by having to spend massive amounts of money.

"You Too Can Hook a Zillionaire!" - This story features a movie that is created that can show ordinary women how they can find a zillionaire to marry. It features the ordinary woman, played by a Lauren Backache who moves into a fancy apartment building with two roommates played by Marylin Mahrone and Betty Graball. Marylin and Betty end up finding zillionaires to marry through dumb luck, while the man Lauren finds ends up being an unemployed bum, showing that an ordinary woman won't be able to hook a zillionaire after all. This story was a parody of the movie How to Marry a Millionaire.